Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
