Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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