problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
