I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
