Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I'm both gender and math confused
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
