Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
