I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
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