she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
farters have to be the big spoon...
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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