Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
