If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
did you just send me my own nude
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
