i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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