Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I want to fling myself into the sun
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
