I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Randomize
