i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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