Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
