After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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