She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
