he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
