well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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