i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
