Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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