I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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