Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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