one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
