"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
