We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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