I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
We don't watch enough power rangers
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
