i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
