toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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