Swine flu. Run for my life!
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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