You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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