Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Randomize