ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
