Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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