he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
