There was a lot of him and a little penis
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Randomize
