biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
