My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize