so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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