Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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