you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
