im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Randomize
