I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
