can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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