Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize