check it out our google latitudes are spooning
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
