I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
