Betty ford says i'm here all night
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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