What a fucking waste of an outfit
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
