"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Randomize
